The season

I still can't believe Christmas is this week. It's such a difference how I feel about the season this year versus any other year. I'm usually so joyful and happy. I'm usually so excited to decorate and spend time with family. This year I am dreading it. I don't want to do anything. I don't want to spend time with family. As of now, I think Sean and I WILL go to my family and his family. But I'm dreading it. I know either Jack won't be mentioned at all or something wrong will be said. Can I just hide until next week?