People announcing their pregnancies don't feel like daggers anymore. Sure, it still hurts because I wish I could be so naive and happy. I wish I could have had a smooth pregnancy with Jack and had my baby boy and not worried like everyone else. I wish that I could have been pregnant with Samantha and I could have not freaked out everyday wondering if she was still moving inside. But I'm happy for people. There are a lot of people announcing their pregnancies with boys. I think it will always hurt a little. I just wish I could have had my boy. And just being around baby boys (which is everyday now) always makes me think of my Jack. Sadly, it's just something I'll never get over. I can only hope it will get easier with time.
One of the boys killed in Connecticut is named Jack. They brought him up a lot in the news today and yesterday because he was one of the first to have a funeral. Those parents will not be able to be normal every time they hear the name Jack. Those parents will feel a little stab in their heart every time they hear that name. Those parents will wish their baby boy Jack was still alive and they could watch him grow. I know this because I feel the same way.
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