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Tomorrow, Samantha will be one year old. I can not believe how fast time has gone. I remember hearing parents say, "kids grow up so fast" or "cherish every single moment before it's too late". I never really understood what they meant until now. I would like to think that Sean and I did the most this first year with Samantha. We have tried to make lots of memories with her, we have let her experience many firsts, and we have tried to document everything in her book. I would like to think she had a pretty good first year. She has been boating, she has been airboating, she loves the water, she's been out in the mud, and she's been to France! Today, I will spend the last day of her being less than one with her. These are the last days of her being a baby. The last days before she goes off to daycare. The last days that I can hold her and squeeze her. The last days when she is completely dependent on me.
I remember last year. It seems so far away. I was waiting in anticipation to meet my baby girl. I was afraid of losing her. I was afraid I would give birth to silent baby again. But I am grateful to say that I remember her cries vividly. I cried with joy looking at Sean saying: "she's crying. She's ok!" Then, as I was being sewed back up, I was given my beautiful baby girl to hold. Tears streamed down my face. I never experienced such relief and gratitude and joy and sadness all balled into one great big emotion.
First time I met my baby girl and got to hold her:
I love you, Samantha. I have loved you before I met you and I will love you forever and ever. You are the light at the end of a very dark tunnel. You are a miracle for your father and me. You are our rainbow baby. You are our loving daughter. Thank you for coming into our lives. Thank you for showing us love that we never thought possible. Happy 1st birthday.
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