The tears have kicked in....

My dearest, Jack. Yesterday was your 2nd birthday and we spent the night with friends celebrating you. We lit 2 lanterns and sent them to the heavens to signify your angelversary. This weekend we were supposed to spend with you at Rocky Lake. I was supposed to set off butterflies in your memory. I was supposed to sit on the dock and be able to talk to you. We were supposed to be able to be with you on your birthday weekend. Instead, your mother had to get hurt and now your family is not able to go and be with you where you are laid on a weekend that is supposed to be spent with you. I am so sorry. I wish so badly I was going up there to be with you. It's killing me that I can't. It's hurting me more than I thought it would. Just please know that where ever I am, you are in my mind and in my heart. And please know that if I could, I would be up there with you. I would be talking to you and spending time with you. I am so sorry. I love you, my two year old boy.