However, new job means new people. And new people means people who don't know about Jack. Sure I have talked about Samantha. But Jack hasn't "come up" yet. I feel guilty that I don't talk about him. But do I randomly say, "by the way, I have a son too but he died." It came up in conversation with one person and I told her about him right away. But only because it was a moment when it made sense to talk about him. And of course she got "chills" and you can hear the sympathy in her voice.
Argh, it's hard. So hard. And I miss him. And his memory seems to be getting too distant and that scares the sh*t out of me. I can't believe it's almost 3 years. I don't want time to go by so fast because I feel like it will fade too much. No matter what though, he crosses my mind all day, everyday....
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